Benefits of Books – Influence: the psychology of persuasion – Dr Robert B Cialdini

6 principles of influence

Because – we need a reason to do something

A principle of human behaviour says that when we ask someone to do us a favor we will be more successful if we provide a reason. As people like to have a reason for what they do.

The word ”because” triggers compliance in humans

Automatic stereotyping / mental shortcut

Expensive = good

People see high price = high quality

You get what you pay for

This works in two ways – offer a high price for a service so people automatically think that expensive is good and then you can say service reduced from expensive to original price and people will still automatically think expensive = good and in due to the reduced price they are getting a good deal

Alfred north whitehead- “civilisation advances by extending the number of operations we can perform without thinking about them”

Contrast principle

Affects the way we see the difference between two things that are presented one after the other. If the second item is fairly different from the first we will tend to see it as more different than it actually is.

If we first lift a light object and then a heavy object we will estimate the second object to be heavier than if we had lifted without lifting the light one.

If you present the lower priced item first then the higher priced item then the higher priced item will seem more costly as a result.

You can make the price of something seem higher or lower depending on what you offer before.

If you give bad news (even fake bad news at the start) and then the real bad news then the real bad news will not seem so bad in comparison

Reciprocation / the rule says that we should try to repay in kind what another person has provided us. We feel the need to return the favor / help someone has given us as we do not want to be in their debt.

Obligation and reciprocation are powerful tools of influence.

Humanity has advanced due to a web of indebtedness .

Negative view of other people who do not reciprocate.

if someone gives us something / does a favor for us, we feel a strong sense of obligation to somehow to repay that debt.

You do not have to like the person who gives you something to feel the need to return the favor / have a sense of obligation.

Useful to have people in your debt. Do favors for people and then in the future they will pay you back.

Free samples – makes you indebted

You can cause indebtedness by doing an unasked for favor or give an un-requested gift

Reciprocation can be used to gain advantage – I give you a coke and you buy raffle tickets that cost more than the coke. The person giving the ”gift or favor” can choose the way for the person to repay the debt.

Reciprocal concessions – someone makes a concession to us and we feel we are indebted to them so we make a concession to them.

I make a concession to you and you will make a concession to me. One way to use this is to make a big request of someone, they say no, then you make a smaller request (you have made a concession) and they will likely now say yes.

e.g. try and sell a 3 year contract and when the person says no, sell a 1 year contract. This is a concession and it is likely that the customer will buy it.

Negotiation – ask for something huge and after it is rejected ask for what you really want. This is dangerous as if the request is too big it is seen as negotiating in bad faith. So the first request has to be big but not too big that it will annoy the other party so much that you get nothing from the negotiation.

How to say no to reciprocation

A policy of saying no to everything is not the answer.

mentally redefine the ”gift” you received as a sales device and now you are outside of the reciprocation rule.

When betting, you feel more confident of your choice AFTER you have for the money and made the bet than BEFORE you did so. This is due to social influence inside us. Once we have made a choice we feel pressure within ourselves to remain consistent. So now we will act in ways to justify our earlier decision.

So when people make a decision they have to continually justify it to themselves and others.

This is self delusion in action. As we went to believe that we made the correct decision so we ignore any evidence to the contrary.

This desire to be consistent after a decision has been made is call the consistency principle.

The desire for consistency is a central motivator of our behaviour.

Example is to ask strangers to do something e.g. watch your things on a beach and if they say yes, they will feel personally responsible for them so will act consistently and protect them.

We view inconsistency in a person as a bad personality trait. They are view as indecisive, confused, two faced.

Consistency as a personality trait is seen as honest, strong character, intelligence. As a society we value good personal consistency.

Being consistent frees us from over thinking, this is automatic behaviour. Same food for breakfast etc

If we make a decision we want to act on it so to be consistent even if there are logical arguments to change the decision.

How can I exploit people’s desire to follow their automatic thoughts and be consistent? – structure my presentation / argument with the audience so their own need to be consistent benefits me.

Example of the toy industry – advertise a new toy before Christmas, everyone then wants it. Parents promise to buy it. Toy manufacturer purposely under supplies stores in December so the parent has to buy a different toy. Then manufacturer realises more more toys in January and February. As the parents promised to buy that toy, they now buy it in January and February . So the parents have bought 2 toys when they only promised to buy one. The parents wanted to remain consistent so they had to buy the toy.

What creates the consistency? the answer is commitment creates the consistency. If I can gt someone to make a commitment on the record (meeting action) then they will act in a way that is consistent with that commitment.

To get consistency we need to first get commitment.

How to get people to help charities – ask them how they are feeling, they will say they are well, then ask them to donate to people who are feeling unwell.

How to get people to volunteer / vote – a day or so before, ask them would they be wiling to volunteer for a charity. They say yes as you are not actually asking them to do anything. Then a few days later a charity asks them there will be a higher % of people volunteering or voting.

When people have said yes or stated they are fine then they will feel bad and socially awkward to then not be consistent and provide the commitment that you have asked for.

For me – at the start of all meetings etc ask people how they are and how their day and work is going. They will way it s going well. Then I can ask later to help with the project by doing something. Asking how people are feeling is a powerful trigger to get people to do things to help others as it starts the process to get their commitment.

How to get compliance and commitment

Start with small request that are difficult for someone not to do as on their own as they are small and seemingly insignificant requests, then build on it.

Sales – get the client to make a small purchase as that gets their commitment. Then try to sell bigger items. This is the ”foot in the door technique” – start with a little request in order to gain eventual compliance with related larger requests later.

Get people to commit to one thing and then people will see themselves as someone who commits to things. Sp to be consistent with this self image they will feel the need to keep doing it.

How to counter compliance

Be careful to what seemingly trivial requests that we say yes too. As even the smallest act can change our self image and therefore influence future behavior.

Writing something influences our behavior as well as just hearing and saying it.

For me – it is always important to get everything in writing from people – it shows their commitment and influences their behavior.

Other people’s opinion of us will influence our behaviour. If we think people view us as charitable then we will give more money to charity as we want to be consistent with this image of us.

creating discipline in yourself – write the goal down you want to achieve on paper

sales tactic – have the client fill in the sales form, then the client feels more committed to the product.

The public eye

Commitments made in writing and in public are the strongest as then people feel social and internal pressure to deliver on them. Write down your goal and share it with friends and family. Then you will be more likely to work towards achieving it. If you only tell yourself then it is easy for you to let yourself off the hook and not do it. We care what other people think about us so we want to be seen in the best possible way.

Extra effort

If you suffer a great deal of pain or hardship to achieve / gain something then you will appreciate it more than if you achieved it / were given it easily and pain free. If it is a group that has a tough and harsh initiation ceremony / procedure to get into it then after you have passed this challenge you will have great loyalty to the group. More loyalty than if you were given automatic membership.

The inner circle

Commitments are most effective in changing a person’s self image and future behavior when they are active and public

We accept inner responsibility for a behavior when we think that we have chosen to perform it in the absence of a strong outside pressure.

So offer a small reward to someone for their commitment, then they cannot say the large prize influenced their actions. A large threat will also not produced long term commitment. Large bribes or threats to children do not give long term commitment.

Low balling sales technique – an advantage is offered to the client that induces a favorable purchase decision, then sometime after the decision has been made but before the bargain is sealed, then original purchase advantage is deftly removed. By the time of the removal of the low ball offer the client has already internally committed to the purchase so will go through with it. Low ball tactic is impressive as it makes the client pleased with a poor choice.

Good intentions + information = no positive change in behavior

low ball tactic for positive good in action example –

Information + public recognition for being good at X = positive behavior change

THEN later say that there will be no public recognition. You will still get the positive behavior change or even more of it!

How to say NO to commitment and consistency

When you realize that the sales person / person is trying to get you to follow mechanical consistency to get your commitment you can say – I recognize your sales technique and I refuse to let myself to be locked into a mechanical sequence of commitment and consistency.

social proof is the one means that we use to determine what is correct is to find out what other people think is correct.

If a lot of people like something (product on amazon, restaurant, movie, TV show, political party) then we will be influenced into liking the same or at least trying it.

We look to others to determine the correct behavior in a given situation.

This desire / need to follow or look to others for clues in how to act can be taken advantage of, e.g. a tip jar has dollar bills in it at the start of a shift, canned laughter track on a TV show, advertisers say something is the fastest selling product / movie, queues to get into clubs, we do not eat in empty restaurants,

We look to others as we think that they have more information or it is the acceptable thing to do, so if they buy something or do something then we will copy them

Sales pitches have “‘client feedback” so you know what other people think of the product (this ”client feedback” could be made up but it would still influence us).

When social proof works best on you – when we are unsure of ourselves, when the situation is unclear or unambiguous, when uncertainty reigns – we are most likely to look to and accept the actions of others as correct.

When this happens – remember that everyone else is probably feeling the same so looking for social proof on what to do next. Other people do not always have the correct answer. Question the source of the answer.

bystander effect in social proof

if there are a lot of people present or involved then the level of responsibility on each person is very low as everyone thinks someone else is responsible. If no one else is acting as if there is an emergency or problem then we will also think the same (social proof) as we look to others for information when we do not have the full picture. So if no one i concerned about something then we are not concerned about it. If everyone is concerned then we are concerned.

What to do if you are having an emergency in a crowd – shout help and identify someone in the crowd to help you e.g. “you in the blue shirt, I need help, call an ambulance”‘ by doing this you have made that person the rescuer and is the only one responsible to help you. So they will now help as there is no doubt that you need help and that they have to help you.

We copy people like us

so if someone like us can do something then we think we can do it as well.

If someone likes us buys something then we will buy it as well as we think it is expected of us. This was me with the idea to buy a house!

When there are published stories of suicides there are more accidental deaths (may not be really accidents but other people seeing that killing oneself is allowed)

How to say no to social proof

many times the information from social proof is useful – what to do in a fire, how to act in public etc

when auto pilot is bad – beware of situations where the social proof is falsified e.g. canned laughter, average person on the street adverts / recommendations

In these cases make a conscious decision to be alert and turn yourself off autopilot. Look for objective facts. Look around you, what can you see?

shares – people invest in the shares that are going up in price which in turn makes the price rise. So ask yourself before you invest – why is the price going up? be objective.

We are more likely to say yes to requests from someone we know and like.

Network marketing – relies on the fact that we are more likely to buy from people we have a strong social connection with.

Saying the name of a person’s friend can also influence them. E.g your friend bob told me that you could help / do x for me. The person then feels like they cannot day no tontou as they would  then be saying no to their friend

People buy from people they like. So the best sales person is someone people like and who will sell at a fair price.

Factors that make people like people / what makes you likeable –

Physical attractiveness

We assign positive characteristics to beautiful people – halo effect – beautiful people must be good

Beautiful politicians win more votes

Beautiful people more likely to be hired

Beautiful people enjoy an enormous social advantage in our culture as they are more liked, more persuasive, more frequently helped and seen as possessing better personal traits and intellectual capabilities